she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
