Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Randomize
