And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
