Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
