Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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