u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Randomize
