Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
