What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
