Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
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