i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
