he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize