so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
