see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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