How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
