Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
