can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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