just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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