Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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