Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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