I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
