just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
