how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Randomize
