nut hugger
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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