Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
