She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
