I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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