i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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