Need sex. Gaining weight.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
