can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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