My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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