Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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