Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
