so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Randomize
