I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
