More tranny stories later!
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
