I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
