She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
