I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Randomize
