is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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