My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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