Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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