i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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