last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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