he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
