Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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