you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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