And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
