im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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