hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
