how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
